Kudos Mommies

Kudos Mommies!!!

Photographed at Maroon Bells,CO,USA

This post is for all those friends of mine who have embraced motherhood recently and kept asking me about how do I manage to get time to write and follow my hobbies with my baby. Well, I must give this credit to my little princess who allows me to have a lot of “me time” everyday. One more thing that I can’t ignore is my family support. Even though I am living far away from my country, I still had my mom with me followed by my mother-in-law (Thanks to the American Consulate for approving their visas on time!!!!). Both these amazing ladies have helped me a lot through my tough times. One hand it is my mother who is also my best critic and has always helped me to remain on track and that keeps me grounded. She is a perfectionist by nature and an immensely creative woman. A very talented singer and a fine home maker whose standards exceed expectation always. On the other hand it’s my mother-in-law who is a depot of traditional values yet a very witty and an expert homemaker. She has always been there for me, whenever I have needed her. Her intellectuality is evident from her great adaptability and acceptance levels. As an avid reader since her childhood she can easily relate to different levels of diverse psychologies. Therefore, I had the support of these two outstanding women until now. Both these ladies with their superfine instincts managed to keep up with my peevishness at this crucial phase. Their unconditional love for their first granddaughter makes them by far the best babysitters that my baby can ever have.

 Well, apart from using my mother’s and mother-in-law’s expertise, I have relied a lot on baby Center website and kept various parenting magazines handy which has helped me to manage my everyday life with my little one. Couple of things which I have learned reading various sources; and want to share them with everyone, these changes has made life a little easy for me. Certainly, worth giving it a try!!!

DISCIPLINE- We are all used to this word since our childhood but I have started being disciplined only after I have become a mother because that’s exactly when I have started craving for some exclusive time for myself,,, which I call “ME TIME”. The initial 2 months are difficult as your baby is still not adjusted to the outside world and have wired sleep patterns. But thereafter, it’s up to us to streamline their sleeping habits. I put my baby to sleep early in the evening sometimes she takes some extra time but definitely before 9 she is asleep. One should not allow late nights for babies and young children because they are highly adaptable; if you allow once or twice then it tends to become a habit for them. To ensure this, there are a few lifestyle adjustments you yourself will have to make like no late night outings, no dinner parties and restricting late night visitors, etc.  After my baby sleeps I get close to 3 hours of “ME TIME”. So before winding up to bed I get ample time to cook, read or sit with my laptop, etc.

DELEGATE- It’s ok to take help from your partner when it comes to babysitting. I learned this from various journals and websites. Baby’s need to develop some amount of bonding with their Dad’s too. And there are some Daddy’s who really aspire to spend time with their little ones. One thing that I have noticed is when my husband is babysitting he is so occupied that he forgets to peep at his e- mails or read his book, which ensures a complete rest for him too, especially for an IT guy (like my husband) whose survival is at stake without having a pesky electronic gadget nearby. He would happily babysit when I go out for a walk or to the gym or sometimes for shopping to ensure I grab a proper “ME TIME” outside the house. When I have my mother or mother-in-law around, life is easy as I can take a break every day to chill out on my own or with a friend. It’s very important to not become obsessive with your baby; and should trust someone else also with the baby care, especially if you are a stay at home mommy. It’s frustrating otherwise and you tend to find everything around quite nettlesome.

At my current disposition, which is greatly uncertain; I long to get pampered, I long to have someone around, who understands me. I am aware that it’s an unusual state of mind which I sometime get into. Funnily, during my 6 week visit after the baby my doctor asked me to answer a questionnaire and from my answers she concluded that I am having mild postpartum depression. But I strongly denied that and I was right as I never felt depressed, only occasional episodes of mood swing would make me have a woebegone look on my face. This is normal to go through such a state of mind after having a baby. Conclusively, surviving 9 months of pregnancy and making it through the discomposure of labor and delivery; resulting in a sudden and tremendous shift in life, together with a huge hormonal surge culminates in a tumultuous state of being for a woman. I am sure my friends who have delivered recently would completely agree with me.

This phase is short-lived and it’s important to make it the most meaningful and memorable period of life. So, ask for help from your partner and family members, get good amount of rest and enjoy every bit of the new life which has emerged out of you. The little miracle lying next to you is precious and deserves to have a Joyful, Smart and Shinning mother and not an Exhausted, Wearied and Fatigued one.